A tasty little research journal on some of the more legitimate biological theories out there. A big thank you to the sender for his input.
Enjoy. ~ Sammich (more…)
If you’ve come to this article after reading part one of our guide, welcome back. Now that you know what to expect from the simple “Basics”, it’s time to venture into some more dangerous territory by looking at the “Smart Ones”. (more…)
Hello survivors and welcome again to another article about how to avoid having a ghoulish figure catch up to you and feast upon your delicious and wholesome brains and yet again we are talking about fitness! We all know that a zombie will be more than happy to dig their disgusting little rotting teeth into the soft and tender flesh of someone’s stomach or hips, but what about their exceptionally toned buttocks? Or trying to bite through some beastly calf muscles? But enough of me fantasizing about my girlfriend and let us get into some tips and tricks about how we can keep ourselves fit for the impending doom. (more…)
If the zompoc was to break out now, my holiday would be ruined. While I am in America, who are known for having automatic rifles on their kitchen tables, it is a foreign country and I know no one here. This raises the question of what would you do if you were stuck in unknown territory? (more…)
[Fitness] Dealing with Injuries
Greetings again survivors to another instalment of how to effectively dodge, swerve, and run from the impending zombie apocalypse. I am sorry that I have been unable to provide any information on this topic for a little while, as I have been disposed as a casualty for the last month, but on the bright side, it struck me as a great topic to write about! (more…)
Written by Ringo
When hypothesizing an apocalypse in which anyone can imagine themselves as a gun-toting, instant survival expert; I constantly find myself focusing on decent places to hunt for supplies. I’m guessing that most of you reading this have realized that the best plan of survival involves getting as far away from a major city as you possible. Sadly, however, I don’t think that’s a real option for me. (more…)
Hello fellow survivors and welcome to another instalment of using the living dead to motivate you into getting outside and enjoy being part of the living. I want to make your heart beat fast, I want to make your breaths long and deep and I want you to feel the strain in your muscles so you know that they are not limply falling off your dead, lifeless bones. Long story short, I want you to use those fantastic gifts that you have which zombies do not. (more…)
Just so we clear things up, let’s go through a quick checklist of how prepared you are;
- Safe house?
- Meeting place?
- Emergency Numbers?
- Other Items?
- Teddy bear or pet?
Right, so now you have each or many of those things, I would like to point out one fatal flaw to all your hours of planning and making decisions, spending hours on the Internet and losing friendships because you have no social life. What’s the problem? One can never be fully prepared for a zombie apocalypse.
Well, I was going to wait for ‘Day Z’ to come out in standalone, but for $20, I said “why not?” I bought myself the ‘War Z’ alpha version. Toast did too, shelling out $60 for the Legend Pack.
We’re both fairly unimpressed.
On paper, the game should be awesome… looting, smooshing zombies, running for your life, sneaking, eating, etc.
In alpha… eh… (more…)
Just a quick post today, wanted to share something so tres adorables with y’all (and I’m trying this new French/Southern American combo thing… I know, it sucks).
Disclaimer: This show is awesome and I love it to obsession… but I can’t help noticing some things…
This article relies on you having seen episode one of season three which aired on FX Australia last night, in Australia. I cannot say this enough, it will be spoilery in here. Not a huge lot, I mean, unless you live under a rock you know the latest season takes place in a…
So you’ve survived the outbreak, you’ve found a group to stick with, and you’ve found a relatively safe place to stay. You feel relieved that you’ve got a moment to rest, but the apparent leader calls for everyone to look for any wounds or bite marks. You search yourself and the person closest to you and find nothing. Everyone reports the same, all but one who remains quiet, clutching his arm. Everyone looks at him, he laughs nervously, “It’s just a scratch” he says. He’s pale, sweating, breathing heavily. The leader walks over to him and says quietly, “You know what has to happen”. The injured man starts to sob, “Please, it’s just a scratch”. The leader walks over to you and hands you his gun, “Do it”. The injured man falls to his knees, still sobbing, “Please…” What do you do now? Whatever happens next, someone has to die. What do you do? Can you do it?
Original Song: Don’t Stand So Close To Me by The Police
(Otherwise known as Jabberwocky’s only cooking skill!)
I have never met one Australian who does not know what Damper is/how to make it. If you don’t, clearly you fell asleep during the ‘Holy crap! There is food that can be cooked without a microwave’ part of History class in primary school.
Now the cool thing about living in the country, is that school trips normally including going in to the bush and having a camp fire, which totally meant that Damper was going to be cooked and enjoyed! Now Damper is not something that you would find in a five-star restaurant, but it is something that can keep your body going in the bush, and it is really easy to make and can last in a backpack without any hassles, it just gets squished if the water bottle falls on it.
This is what happens when Jabberwocky procrastinates cleaning her room
Zombies have been around for thousands of years, dating back to even before any other horror character that we know and love today. They even predate vampires in some cultures and the earliest piece of writing about zombies was written before The Book Of Revelations. Which ignoring the fact it is a religious piece of writing (for those of you who do not believe) we all know that it was written a hell of a long time ago. (more…)
So as you all know by now, there are zombie survival obstacle courses popping up across America. I’ve been putting some serious thought into the most important question… What am I going to wear?
Who are you? Ask yourself. Now. NOW. Good. I’m guessing you answered with the standard name, age, and birthplace, but is that who you really are? Is that what defines you? If it is then good work, you probably need to get out more. If it isn’t, you’re on the right track. Knowing who you are, who you really are, is one of the greatest things a wo/man can know. Unfortunately for us, not many people really know themselves inside and out. It’s something we continually strive to understand. But if you start learning about yourself now, when the time comes that you need to put all your cards on the table, it’ll put you that much further ahead in the race to survive. (more…)
Bath Salts and You:
Whenever I think of bath salts, I think of the smelly stuff you stick in your bath water when you think that your partner will enjoy you smelling of something other than soap. They are also good for getting rid of the smell of cow poop (thank you, milking time!). But the Bath Salts that have been on the news recently under all the ‘zombie attacks’ are not something you put in your bath water.
Hello there my readers, it’s Jabberwocky here with another article!
This article won’t save your life in the zombie apocalypse, but it will make you feel better when faced with a zombie to know that there are things out there way more scarier.
Now this list is a generic list of things people find freaky and scary, if you are not one of these people, congratulations, but if you are; welcome to the article of nightmares
Good morning ladies, gentlemen and those yet to look between their legs. Tofu here to brighten your day with another hopefully funny and insightful look at the ponies that govern my existence how they relate to the shambling undead things trying to take a hunk of my delicious man flesh back to their undead families for dinner. For those of you only finding this entry or the sure to come straight to dvd movie and you do not have permission to view it, run while you can. They’ve been alerted. Today we look at a very special episode, “Bridal Gossip” and how the lessons learnt will keep you safe when the ghouls come marching in. Let’s get this ball rolling.
HELLO EVERYBODY!!! Here once again, we return to the seedy underbelly of internet based writings as I, Tofu take you on a magical quest to the technicolour world of tomorrow … now with more ponies ^_^ Today we’ll be looking at “Look before you sleep” a tale of woe, lightning, hostage situations and more hair care than you could poke a freshly snapped twig at. Onwards with the show! (more…)
My Little Zombie: Survival is Mandatory – Episode 6: You’ve got to fight, for your right … to yaaaaaay
Howdy howdy to you, fair internet dwellers. We have so much pony to discuss and all the time in the world to talk about it … provided the internet doesn’t crash like that one time and we all had to venture to that creepy mystical place of outside. This episode we’re putting Dragonshy under the blood encrusted microscope, that’s right … We finally get to properly introduce Fluttershy into this psychotic mixed bag of ponies that takes place in my head and to be honest I am going to be slightly biased to her character because I genuinely dislike her at this point in the story and try as I might I just can’t find a way to express that dislike without coming across as a bitter old man. So with that little disclaimer out of the way, let’s get cracking. (more…)